Breaking news here at Celebrity Religion HQ! According to extremely reputable sources, The Scottish Daily Star reports that Witch Doctors are putting a curse on David Beckham and the English football team.
Sandwiched between pages and pages of naked women (who doesn't love the British Tabloids?) the newspaper reports that fans of the Trinidad and Tobago football team (thats soccer team for our American readers) are using magical incantations to hex Becks and his team mates ahead of their match on June 15th. Not ones to reinforce negative stereotypes, The Daily Star reports that;
"The crafty Caribbeans have sacrificed cockerels in secret rituals... and they have told followers to bury birds' heads near the homes of England's star players."
Apparently Trinidad and Tobago have been up to this sort of mischief before, with Mexico claiming in 1973 that voodoo was used to cause seven players to suffer freak injuries. All is not lost for the England team, however, as England based voodoo priest, Doctor Snake has offered up this advice;
"The team's best bet is to use my Hex Zapper spell, which will vaporise a hex or curse in a flash. First cut out a silhoutte of a human figure from parchment or even from a newspaper. Then write the name of the person who has been hexing you on the paper doll and for each day cut a piece of the paper off and burn it."
I am positive that Sven will be spending hours and hours making paper voodoo dolls. But if i were him, I would be more concerned about bird flu than hexes...
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